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Why people don't go to therapy for "problems"

“I tend to believe that people don't seek out therapy due to “problems,” since what are labeled as problems are often actually adaptive and protective solutions to previous problems (that feel problematic because they're being used out of context).”

 

The parts of the self that hold the problematic patterns of behavior (sometimes labeled as “symptoms”) are the parts of the self that carry deep suffering and fear, to which those same behaviors were created in response to protect the self. Those parts developed necessary (and historically successful) methods of survival to protect the self during vulnerable and threatening times. Because they ensured survival, those responses become embedded in the implicit/instinctive mind and are used to navigate future environments, situations, and relationships, which evoke the same belief from when those patterns were created. The same method and urgency of protection (responses) often becomes distressing and ineffective later in life, because those behaviors are based on previously-learned beliefs about the world and self that don’t accurately reflect current reality. 

 

The neural connections that hold those beliefs and behaviors can be accessed, updated, and repaired to mend the internal relationship and its experience of/with itself, and cultivate more presence and agency in life. Shifting the perspective and relationship with problematic patterns of behavior through healing, resilience, and compassion promotes healthy internal attachment and transformational growth.

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